so..went to Bangalore to take up my GRE computer science exam..you are right, i'm not doing my PHd next year, still a friend recommended I write it..so i took it up. frankly, i didn't spend even an hour for the preparation.
So it didn't turn out to be really good..but i enjoyed the three hours glued to the question paper..skipping tuff math questions..and answering the other computer science related questions..worse part was .. it was negative marking. anyway, chuck that. that night i watched this movie..called, 'The social Network' based on a book.. about Mark Zuckerberg..The only thing that came up to my mind as soon i finished the movie was.. 'Inspiring'.
put it on ny fb..n found out that ..not many found it as brilliant as i did.. why? no idea.
but one thing for sure.. that night, after the movie i felt totally under achieved..
I'm fuckin 23 years old.. and can i think of something that i can call an 'achievement'. sadly no!
it was eating my head that night. i have done a lot of things, few people around me haven't. But still .. i don't call it an achievement. why am i so unsatisfied with the myself? Contentment..is something that i have not felt, about anything. where am i ? what am i born to do in this world ? and what am i doing ? NO IDEA!
anyway, at the moment all that i want to do is.. get deep into computer science and learn all that i missed learning as an under graduation student.
Today is sunday, which means it was last night I watched the movie. This morning I went to ISKCON.. the very famous Lord Krishna Temple, all around the world. I loved it, and it was not my first time. I entered..there was Narasimhan Sanadhi .. then there was a Lord Venkateshwar ( Venky ) sanadhi.
I had forgotten my glasses, i borrowed my mum's spare and looked into the idol of Lord Venky. My mind was flashed, totally. It's been a long time since I prayed to God for something.. so i was hoping i would start again. But damn, i just got lost into him.. I couldn't pray..it was more like a submission. stood there looking into him..for a very longtime. It was nice. i felt nice totally.
I felt like there was nobody around me..it was just me and God..i was on the sea..floating and the lord was looking into me from the sky. hehe. never felt that way before. Now and then I was sinking..and hands from the underneath kept bring me outside...and after sometime I could just survive in the water. WOW.
It was a lovely time.
got back home..after watching 'Bolt' and 'How to lose a guy in 10 days?'. lolz. the latter movie.. ended up..in not being able to dump him. so.. nobody can? hehe. wish i could find out. but i surely wouldn't risk..the hearts.
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